But now, I'm reaching the breaking point of pure frustration when I hear stroke survivors talk about themselves or other survivors with the following phrases. If you want to use these 5 phrases, please go right ahead. But for me, these phases are absolutely non-sensical and inane! And yes, I'm judging you.
3. I get shivers when shouting between stroke survivors is not corrected on the spot. You might say, "Hey. I'm a stroke survivor. I am not deaf!" (By the way, deafness always ranks under blindness. When some can't see, it's a tragedy. When someone can't hear, it often brings out giggles even though one of the senses is lost. That, too, is a tragedy).
4. My anger increases when a stroke survivor says, "If you put your mind to it, you can do anything." That statement is not true for the majority. For example, most stroke survivors can't drive anymore, especially if they had seizures. Any activity requiring two, stable hands? Even holding a paperback book, or putting on a jacket, or clapping? Out of the question.
5. I believe in God, but some survivors bring religion into the mix heavily. I heard one survivor say, "If you pray every night, God will reward you and improve your condition." And if you don't pray every night? God will punish you? I don't think so.
1. "My stroke-versary [a play on anniversary] is coming up next month!" often said with a grinning emoji. Like this: 😀
Or worse, like this:
I get that anniversaries are once-a-year events, but there's a celebratory air, and really, what's there to celebrate, when your life has to be re-adjusted, re-evaluated, and basically re-done forever, and when you have other "things" wrong with you that you didn't have pre-stroke. Some people would say, "I'm lucky to be alive." But that's the nature of survivors. You lived. Everyone knows that by your presence. In my view, it isn't a reason to throw a party.
2. I don't like words "handicapped" or "disabled" when stroke survivors talk about themselves. "Survivor" or even the newer "thriver," yes! C'mon, people, let's get positive. Handicapped or disabled seems to venture in the area of less cognizant, or competent, than the normal person. And speaking of normal, I don't like word either. Nobody is normal if they have eccentricities, or neuroses, or psychopathies, of just plain weird behavior. Everybody in the world has a funkiness about them.
The above is just a rant, to get those points on the screen so maybe you will read them again and give me a pass, and know what it's like if a stroke survivor is having a really bad day.
I've never rejoiced my yearly stroke condition wouldn't dream of celebrating my 2 painful years I don't like it when people seem to show off saying I've had 3 strokes I just think what the feck why have u had 3 strokes are you not taking your meds correctly or something cos obviously to me somethings going wrong
ReplyDeleteThere are many reasons for strokes. Taking medicine improperly is only one. But yes, people make light or show off about their strokes which is inappropriate. Thanks for your comment!
ReplyDeleteYeah I get it too we don’t have days where YEAH let’s celebrate one or more of our scariest days of our lives! That have taken things that were so valuable. Made some of us insecure and depressed and forget! I hate when people say “you just need to write it down! Grr. Then he’s gonna remember that I even wrote it down or where that nobody knows that I wrote it in because I have a whole bunch of notepads all over it doesn’t phase me to even look at them! I think a positive attitude is great and we can’t stay in those few moments forever but some days it’s good to rant and rave get it out. But some people really truly don’t have support systems because now their behavior has alienated them because no one understands. My daughter hasn’t talk to me in three years can’t be for my granddaughter. My son says mom I’ve already read it I get it. But he doesn’t he thinks I’m like his wife’s grandmother! Yet you never know what we can survive until we have to but if I had to do it again I’m not sure but I would use it in some ways yes I’ve learned some lessons. And others I really liked myself before in my life had just hit the height of my career, my home life seems perfect two. Now if I was given awareness and not so oblivious I was happier being oblivious. I think the great thing is is that we just have to support each other even if our days are crappy or than others and know that was hard for one person it’s hard for them and just because we’ve had it three times more doesn’t mean there’s is it hard for them they’ve not had the three times experience. That is the lesson I’ve learned from this but I like I did like myself before! She didn’t have a short temper and upset everybody
ReplyDeleteI am happy that you said that if can do anything if put your mind to it, I can't do anything! I can't drive and my hand won't massage people. Thanks
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